Friday, March 5, 2010
Now You're Just Testing Me, Not Fair!
Most people think of God as that one guy up in the clouds, but one of my best friends and I prefer to think of him as a best friend who's always around. You see, God doesn't want you to refer to Him as the "guy up in the sky" if He's right there beside you. And since he's with you all the time, everywhere you go, He's more like a best friend who hangs out with you whenever and wherever. Now that you understand this informal, but nonetheless close relationship, hopefully you'll understand what I'm about to say.
Sometimes your friends like to play match-maker, you know? Sometimes you go along with it because you think it would be easier than dealing their harrassment for rejecting their "help." But what happens when you tell God, the ultimate best friend, that you're not looking right now? What happens when you tell Him that you need friends that are female, not girlfriends? Yeah, He does the typical friend thing and says, "Oh really?" In defiance, I of course said, "Yeah, really..." That's how it always begins... The only problem is that when you play this game with God, who isn't just the ultimate best friend but also master of the universe, you quickly have the cards stacked against you in the friendly competition.
Yesterday, in Acting I there were four of us who were schedule to perform our monologues. I performed mine first, and of course, was well received by everyone. After that, I sat down and was about ready to pretty much tune out. I wasn't tuning out because I meant any disrespect to my classmates, but I had to internalize whatever energy and strength I had left. I was really craving a cigarette and so I had to focus on something else or go mad. And then it happened, my best friend God played the ultimate "Oh Really?" challenge on me. The last person to give their monologue was flawless in their delivery. I wanted to cry because the subject of the monologue was a girl who wanted to kill herself and lot of the things she was saying brought back memories of people I know who have wanted to or tried to kill themself. Then something happened that I wasn't expecting, the character decided that if she hadn't been able to kill herself after three attempts, that God must have a reason for her being on this earth and that she wasn't going to take her own life.
My jaw dropped. I mean, after I heard her listening to Kutless, I wondered where she stood concerning Christ. So I asked her about this conference that she mentioned while receiving criticism, and that's when I discovered just how closely aligned our spiritual beliefs are. Oh snap! So God asked me last night, actually it was late afternoon, "Are you going to be her friend? Or are you going to throw it away and try to date her?" When you tell your best friend who also happens to be God, that you are swearing-off dating until you can straighten out your life, you'd better mean it. He put someone in my path who could use a friend, but He's also told me I'd be making a huge mistake if I randomly decided to try to date her.
I guess this is where God says to me, "Now put your money where your mouth is." So now I understand the power of my words. I threw it out there that I wasn't ready to date, which is unbelievably true, and now God is challenging me to live up to that and make friends with this young lady; not try to pursue her. It's sad how I've practically forgotten how to just be friends with girls, and the ones I was friends with I was able to do so because I saw them as my sisters. So yeah, my best friend God just gave me a serious accountability check and wager at the risk of losing a friend.
Until next time,